The kids and I moved into this apartment after my husband got deployed. He did get to come home one weekend before he left and he saw what it looks like, but other than that, he's never lived here.
We had a house that we sold. A cute little three bedroom house with a nice playroom in the basement and a big fenced in backyard. The neighborhood was pretty good, too. I could let the kids play out front or ride their bikes in the street without too much worry. There was always someone around for them to play with.
Drew got into it with the people across the street once and we stopped playing with those kids, but other than that, they had a lot of friends.
So here we are, in an apartment that looked really big until we moved all of our crap in. There is a private entrance, and three bedrooms. The room that Drew and Hunter share is huge. There are two bathrooms (I get one all to myself!) The kitchen is small as hell, though. There's a dining area that I can only fit a tiny round table in (good thing I already had one) and it's a good thing my husband isn't here because with the high chair for Hunter, only three chairs fit around the table. Also a garage that is filled to the very top with all the crap that seemed to fit nicely in my house.
Ok, so my point is, it's small, and I'm tired of it!
But I wonder a lot of times, as I see my neighbors looking at me, what do they think? Do they wonder why they never see a man go in and out of my place? Do they wonder why I have three kids, no husband, and yet, don't work?
I only talk to the people directly underneath me. They are older, ok, really old, like mid-80's, but really nice. They tolerate our noise and the lady has told me that days we are away all day she gets lonely without the constant pitter-patter. She jokingly asks if Drew ever walks, or does he just run all the time! I can hear their giant grandfather clock chime off the quarter, half, and full hours. Drew is constantly dropping things off the balcony, and the old lady always puts them on our doorstep. Some days we have a whole Hot Wheel collection sitting out front. Then Drew gets one of those looks from me. You know, the, Why did you do that? look!
When we first moved in last April, the girl next to me said she apologizes ahead of time if her cat disturbs us. CAT? Disturb us? Ummm.... I don't get it! A dog would disturb us, but a cat? I said, well, I have three rowdy and wild kids who are used to their own house, so I apologize for them! (Trumped her cat, didn't I?!)
Every once in awhile, though, I'll catch a look from someone. Someone who I know wonders. Wonders just how it is that I'm living here with no man, and seemingly no job.
On the other hand, the manager of the complexes knows my story and he likes to talk about everyone. So maybe everyone already knows and I'm just being paranoid!