Thursday, October 05, 2006

When it rains.... the poo hits the fan...

Wait, that doesn't sound right. When it rains.... shit hits the ceiling.... No, that's not right either. Ok, when there's shit, and a fan, and lots of rain.... nothing good can come from it!
That sounds good!
Let me list off all the crap, then I'll explain it. Sound good?
1. lost my wedding ring
2. engagement ring is broken (the band snapped off by the mounting)
3. my 15 year old cat, and best friend, has stopped eating and is all skin and bones and I can't afford to keep pumping money into her
4. my deadbeat brother-in-law, dead sis-in-law's widower (although he doesn't deserve to be called that) was in jail. My inlaws were taking care of my niece, their daughter's daughter. My niece was adjusting well and settling into kindergarten. Said deadbeat bro-in-law is out of jail and has taken back his daughter. I don't forsee anything good coming from this.

Ok, I think that about sums it up for now, but if there's anything else, I'll let you know.
Now for my rings. I know the wedding ring is somewhere in this pigsty that is my room. All I have to do is peel layer by layer and hopefully I'll find it. It is quite the daunting task, though. My engagement ring broke once before, years ago. It cost $200 to fix it back then, and I don't have $200 now. So I guess it will be quite awhile before I get to wear that again.

My cat, my sweet, sweet Nikki! I got her on December 5, 1991, and she was 8 weeks old. She was my dream come true and we've been best friends ever since. And now she's stopped eating and she's skin and bones and she's just old. I know that vets want you to spend every cent you have to fix whatever is wrong with them. But what if she's 15 years old and just, well....old. Animals can die of old age, too. I don't know if it's right to keep spending money I don't have to fix her when she's this old. And my husband, although he knows how much I love her and he's spent tons of money on her before, would tell me enough is enough. So this is a decision that I'm going to have to make very soon. For now she's responding well to the canned food that the vet suggested and we'll see what else he has to say on Tuesday.

Now, for what's happening with Eve, my niece. Her dad has had what he calls a bad string of luck since her mom died. I say bullshit! There's no bad luck about his behavior since his wife passed away almost two years ago.
To make a really long story short, he was in jail for drunk driving and my inlaws were taking care of Eve. She was adjusting nicely and had started kindergarten. She wore them out, but they loved having her. They would do anything for their daughter, Tabitha (who we all knew was the favorite!), and in turn they would do anything for Eve.
Now, this bro-in-law of mine has a new girlfriend who he's decided to shack up with, not for love, not for companionship, but for the sole purpose that he's lazy and doesn't want to work and she likes working full time and taking care of loafers. So she's graciously accepted Eve and her daddy into her home. Isn't she a saint? And maybe this girl is very nice, but don't you ever, ever come in and try to replace Eve's mommy. We won't have any of that! And yes, Tabitha has been gone for two years, and yes, her husband has a right to move on. But it's not that simple. I only wish it were a need for companionship on his part. He does have a need, though, he has a need to sponge off of as many people as possible. And this poor girlfriend fell for his bull crap hook, line, and sad little sob story. As Kate tells me, "Women grieve, men replace".
So on Tuesday, a day after what would have been Tabitha's 29th birthday, Eve's dad and new girlfriend go to my inlaws to take Eve "home" to a place that isn't her home. To this girlfriend's apartment.
Since there's nothing else I can do right now, I pray. I pray for Eve. I pray that she adjusts well to being back with her dad. I pray that this new girlfriend takes good care of our little girl. I pray that momma Tabitha watches over her sweetpea. I pray that Eve's dad gets his head out of his ass and realizes that he has a real live human being that is dependent on him and that YES he CAN stand up a be a man for the first time in his life and get a job and work and support his daughter. The daughter that he made with a woman he claims he was madly in love with. I can tell you one thing, no one who loves their partner that much ever treats their kids that way.

Most of this is fixable. It is just overwhelming because so much stuff happened at the same time. Some other things, but I'm not brave enough to tell them. Financial things and let's just say, it will take me awhile to dig out of this one!


navywife6 said...

Oh Peggie my dear, dear friend. I am so sorry all of the CRAP hit the FAN at once. I wished I had some AMAZING words of wisdom but I don't honey. All I can say is you are in my thoughts and prayers everyday.

Hang in there honey, and if you need me I am just a PM away.

Sending tons of GOOD VIBES to you,

Jen said...

Oh, honey!!!! Hang in there!!!!! It's got to get better - sorry other than that, no other advice. I'm here to listen - anytime!


Sandy said...

I'm sorry. :( I do hope the rain stops soon.

The vet? Honestly, not all of them are like that. We could have spent boat loads more cash to try to give our dog another year...maybe. Our vet was very understanding and laid out all our options. She said quite sincerely that sometimes it's simply not putting the animal or the family through the process of treatments and the only ones that know that answer are the owners. We put our dog down in May. It was a terribly difficult thing to do. But it was the *right* thing for her.

I am praying for little Eve too. Poor child. :(

Jen said...

Oh my. I just wish I could be there to help in whatever way I could!
Eve is such a resilient little girl, and she (even if she isn't old enough to fully understand it) has in her heart her momma's love, and all the love, hopes, and prayers of the rest of her family to help keep her strong. She'll make it- it may be a rocky road, but she'll stumble through it just the same!
As for your dear friend, I'm afraid there's nothing I can say but I'm so sorry!
And your ring... well, shoot. Guess you have to clean that stupid room, now. Darn it all, that stinks!! But like you said, it's in there, it's just a matter of finding it!! It'll turn up eventually!
Hang in there sweetie and just keep plugging away:) I wish I could handle things as well as you do!! I really admire you, you know!

kateandjona said...

I'm losing my elderly minature schnauzer Thelma right now too - her sister Louise died in May. It's hard. (Harder for Jona - he is "Thelma's boy")

You just continue to be the consistent factor in Eve's life. It will make a difference. As for the rest of that situation, try to let it go. You can't fix it. I'm sorry.

I'm here if you need me! And I'll watch for that happy e-mail telling me you've found your ring! (I lost mine for several weeks following Don's death, and was positively beside myself!)

Hey ... I can trade you my $2,311 electrician's bill for the bill to get your ring fixed??? Yeah, I didn't think so ... but at least I have electricity (AND HEAT!!!) again!

Chaos Mommy said...

I didn't know that you guys have a dog, Kate! I'm sure Jonathon will take it hard when it's time to let his friend go. I know, I tear up just thinking about it. Luckily she's responding well to the canned food. But still, she's 15, it's going to happen someday soon.
Sometimes I think that's why God gave us Scooter and helped Andrew to be so understanding about it. He knows I need my pets around me at all times!

Lori Anne said...

I know what you mean about rings(did that) animals(did that a lot), and brothers-in-law. I've got one. Take the money you would have spent on the cat, and buy
b-i-l a plexiotomy. You just cut out the belly button and replace that section with a piece of plexiglass. That way you can see where you're going when your head is up your ass. It's tough to watch someone do a poor job of raising any child, but especially a child you love.(Did that too). Not to say I fully feel what you're feeling, just to say I really do understand. xoxoxoxo