My best friend just found out that her mom has cancer. Not dying, just diagnosed. They believe they caught it early enough. I never thought to ask what kind of cancer. I was just worried about her as I read her email where she was freaking out. Something hereditary, she said. So even more cause for alarm.
How do you deal with this? What do you say, what do you do? Of course, I sent her my prayers and love. But what next? She will worry about her mom, and in a small way, herself, for a long time now. I care for my friend, she's my best friend, but what can I do from 1200 miles away?
Well, for starters I can post her here in my blog and ask for prayers! Then, I can treasure every day I have with my own kids.
Life is all too fragile, and I've been the bitter witness to that. With my sister in law who passed away in November 2004, we saw the passing of a life in an instant. She fell over dead at work with no warning whatsoever. Now THAT is tragic, and has left us with nothing but heartache and trouble since then!
Three of the four grandparents I grew up with are gone. Two of them were sick for many many years and we welcomed the fact that they finally got relief from the pain. One was taken when we weren't ready to let her go yet. Not to mention other friends and relatives, so I've seen death and celebrated lives.
That leaves me with the age old question, How do we make best of the time we have here? Many people live that day to day grind where you have a million and one things to fit in besides going to work. And the rest of us who don't, still live in in a chaotic mess that doesn't have an end or give us much breathing room.
Sometimes you have to figure out small ways to make your time here feel important. Tell everyone you love them every time you see them. Smile, often, no matter what! Let people take pictures of you. When you're gone, it's all they will have. Write letters, take time out for those you care about. A little note every now and then will make someone's day more than you know. Spoil your kids with hugs and kisses. Be the first to say you're sorry, like my Australian friend Anna says, be the grown up!
Just live! Go out, have fun, but remember who is most important in your life.
If you couldn't tell, I think about this stuff a lot. With all my ailments and illnesses, I can never be too careful. I would love people to look back someday and say, She spent all her time with her kids, she lived for them. Isn't that wonderful?!
**Edit: My friend's mom has breast cancer, and they start talking about treatment this week. It was caught early enough that everything should be fine!
CLICK THE BREAST CANCER WEBSITE LINK TO HELP DONATE FREE MAMOGRAMS TO NEEDY WOMEN!
And say a prayer! Thanks!